On the Sidewalk with FML – Things that make me Laugh, 9-25-10

Today, I was standing on the corner of Second and Market for quite a while.  That’s a good spot.  Several of us were there so we could see scrums coming down the sidewalk from any direction and help if they needed us to.  The blondish preacher guy was standing there too, reading the Bible outloud and harranging us.   This is the one who claims to have been cured of being homosexual – you know who I mean.   His son was there today too, which makes me feel a little sad, just because – how strange must that be for him, the son?   But anyhow.

You all know that one of the goals of the protesters is to talk the client into going to the fake clinic so they can either:

a)  Convince her not to have an abortion or

b)  Delay her so long she misses her appointment or

c)  Get her to eat something so she can’t have the procedure.

That isn’t something I’m making up to be mean, this is what they’ll admit they do.

Anyhow, we escorts were talking to each other, and trying to ignore preacher dude, although we did get sucked in occasionally.   I was particularly annoyed with myself a couple of times, like when I heard myself arguing with him about what God wants.  I had to walk away and calm down, but I came back and worked on ignoring him.

A car stops at the light;  the passenger rolls the window down.   She’s a woman, maybe in her fifties; the driver looks like her husband.  I think it’s the matching t-shirts that gives me that impression.

Anyhow, D, an escort, leans down toward her, she asks him about where to turn for the Heart Walk they’re doing this morning.   The one way street system is complex, and I hear D say, “Well, if you want to go east, you have to go this way,” pointing down the street the clinic is on.

They begin to make the turn, slowly, and Preacher dude yells at them, “DON’T DO IT!  THEY’RE TRYING TO DIVERT YOU!  THAT’S THE ABORTION CLINIC!”

I swear, it takes 5 seconds for that to register.  Then it hits me.  Don’t do it – we’re trying to divert them TO the abortion clinic?  This 50 year old woman and her matching husband?  And I start to laugh.

“Omigod” – I’m giggling – “Omigod, he did not just say that.  We’re trying to DIVERT them, for what?  to go have an abortion?”

Giggling too,  someone else says, “No, we just hate the heart walk – we don’t want them to raise money for that, right?”

Laughing harder now, I say – “But doesn’t he know – doesn’t he know – that if you’re going to have an abortion – you have to BE pregnant?!!!  I mean -” I’m bent over now – “you can’t just PICK somebody off the street and DIVERT them to the clinic for an abortion…omigod…”

“Well,” another escort says, “He is the one who thinks you can cure homosexuality, maybe he DOESN’T know how it works.”

And you know, that sounds crazy, but I still don’t know – after all, why on earth did he say that?  “They’re trying to DIVERT you…”   And it still makes me smile…

3 thoughts on “On the Sidewalk with FML – Things that make me Laugh, 9-25-10

  1. Thanks for the giggle! Ya gotta look for all the humor you can find, and they often hand it to you on a platter!
    One of my favorites is bright yellow sign one woman holds that says something like, “Pregnant? Free Help Here”, but she is standing in front of our clinic! I laugh out loud every time she does, too, and I thank her. She just stares without comprehending.

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